Why did I run the tests?

I wonder why one of my earliest reactions to the report was to reasearch about the tests and to run them to myself.

First, I think it was a reaction I typically have when I am dealing with "Black Boxes": I want to know what's inside, I'm driven by curiosity and by my self indulgency of believing that I can do it myself, better. Second, I think I was driven by the need of convincing myself that there was some scientific value in this evaluation that justified its cost and that I haven't been ripped-off. Third, I thought that it would fair to my son to go through some of the monkey-lab-like experience I have push him through, probably against his will, to share with him part of the experience of being the object of a psychological experiment as opposed to being just an outside observer. Lastly, and perhaps and most importantly, I was reluctant to accept that these tests could reveal anything truthfull and provide a believable clue. I was trying to refute them. I was looking for a proof of their worthness, their flaws. It was probably a way to avoid accepting the diagnosis, to avoid moving forward to the next, painful, step, the treatment.

Eventually, I realized that it was pointless to pursue this test investigation further and I decided to move on.